Epidemiology jokes

Epidemiology jokes! This one's for all you epidemiologists, feverishly Googling the evening before your big seminar, searching for a little icebreaker-- a little nugget of self-deprecating humor to win the crowd over. Show them you're not some pointy-headed stiff. Do you like to laugh? Everybody likes to laugh! Laughter is the best medicine.

I get a fair amount of Google hits on this site for "epidemiology jokes" for some reason, so I thought I'd cater to this important demographic. Here is a comprehensive list of epidemiology jokes:

Fuck you, parasites. Make up your own goddamn jokes.