You are women and men of action. You have no time for dilly-dallying. You despise bloated prose, frippery, serifs, stopping at the roadside stand for cherry cider. There is simply no room for the slightest inefficiency. A to fucking B, you get me? This is why, for your convenience, today's post will be in a special format. Bullet points. You deserve it. You really do.
- Elementary schools should incorporate into sex education A.G. Rizzoli's incredibly baroque illustration & schematic of the female orgasm ("The Bluesea House"). Here we have a visual feast of graphs, charts, illustrations, and nonsensical annotation in varying fonts. This is the female orgasm portrayed as only a lonely, gentle, insane man with tremendous skills of draftsmanship (and no sexual experience) could portray it. Which is to say, it is bizarre and kind of funny. I keep saying this, but I will write more about this guy in coming posts. In the meantime, read here about his life.
- Friend AW is a doctor unconstrained by borders. Regarding a man receiving emergency surgery in the sticks of El Salvador, she notes that "If I was the dude I wouldn't have let a group of doctors stick a tube in my chest when they are reading the directions off the box, translated by someone (me) who keeps saying 'I don't know what this word means.' He is still alive."
- Some overzealous Yankees ticket salesman got a slap on the wrist for bitching about the World Baseball Classic. I can maybe see some 47-year old with khakis, a braided belt, a tucked-in golf shirt, & a miserable 11-year-old son getting pissed because he bought a two-week vacation package to Florida and Jeter's not in camp. Big fucking deal. I love the idea of a global baseball tournament. Selig's on the right side of this one, even if it's for the wrong reasons. And did you see that Korea upset Japan? I like Japan's team, but that's pretty cool, especially given the not-uncommon racism with which Japan is blessed.
- I really couldn't care less about the Oscars, except that I'm gonna win some money. Although I did not see Crash, I know that I would despise it nearly as much as I despised Garden State, which is saying quite a bit, quite a bit.