Common, but uncommonly great, if you know what I mean.
#68: Power Locks
#67: The Interdental Fricative
Without it, lisping wouldn't be nearly as funny.
#66: The Fake Punt
With a fake field goal, you're swapping a shot at 3 points for a shot at 7. With a fake punt, it looks like you're giving the ball away... but NO! And, unless it's a fumblerooski play, the punter usually has to do something to which he is unaccustomed: 1) throw the ball, 2) run the ball, 3) take a massive fucking hit. The fake punt gives rise to something even better:
#65: The Moment When Defenders Realize There's A Fake Punt
I love this moment. I could watch it on instant replay over and over again. "Ok, hit my blocker, drop back for the return... WHA?" If I had a "coach's clicker" (what ever happened to that?), I would wear the thing out.
#64: The Greater Kudu
Don't look for the lesser kudu further down on this list, for obvious reasons.
#63: Coffee Shops Posting That Onion Article By The Counter
You know, the one with the headline "Sources: Barista Not Actually Flirting With You". Lots of cafes go this route. Although it might seem like a big fuck-you to the customer, it makes purchasing coffee a far less pressure-filled transaction. Now you can wear anything when you go for your morning joe. This morning, for some reason, I had rubbed chutney over my body and then rolled around in Puffed Kashi. Ordinarily I would get dressed before stepping outside to grab coffee, but this time I didn't even put on my plastic batting helmet.
#62: Winter Olympics-Based James Bond Chase Scenes
It's kind of hard to go wrong here.
#61: Protein Folding
From what I understand, it's very important.
#60: A.O. Scott
I saw him in a Tribeca cafe last month. He looked doughy. If I had grabbed him by the lapels and spoken to him (spittle flying out of my mouth, misting his glasses), it would have been to compliment him on his review of "Away We Go," which was kind of perfect. God, Sam Mendes is horrible.
The 100 Greatest Things Of All Time: So Far
100: The 1989 Honda Civic LX sedan (manual transmission)
99: Weird dream that a Merychippus had one time
98: The sun
97: Pharrell Williams
96: A shack near San Gregorio, CA
95: The breakfast sandwich
93: Seeing through Melville's bullshit
92: The scrappy white guy
91: Barack Hussein Obama
89: Dinosaur tributes
88: The way Jason Statham would pronounce "hydrocortisone"
85: Vernon Davis
84: 9969 Braille
82: The balk rule
80: This answer to the question "Is it possible to have wooden legs and real feet?"
78: Quantum Mechanics
77: Will Clark
76: Man Vs. Wild
73: The Oval Logos Of The Late 1990s
71: Baby Wipe Warmer Cleaner Holder Rags
68: Power Locks
67: The Interdental Fricative
66: The Fake Punt
65: The Moment When Defenders Realize There's A Fake Punt
64: The Greater Kudu
63: Coffee Shops Posting That Onion Article By The Counter
62: Winter Olympics-Based James Bond Chase Scenes
61: Protein Folding
60: A.O. Scott
Friday, February 19, 2010